Looking towards 2019
January is in full swing. We have returned to our routines for our school days. Family has flown away back to their overseas home for ministry. It seems like a calm time is approaching our family. This year I want to seek to be depending on God in all things.
I must admit that when it appears that calm is coming to our life I feel the need to brace myself. Instead of depending on God I feel the need to guard against a coming storm. As things have started to come close to anything I consider as normal something tragic, startling or difficult seems to hit our family.
2018 was a difficult year for our family. Our year was filled with doctor appointments, medications, and many unanswered questions. All these problems have left me a bit wary of things that are coming. Yet, there have been many amazing glimpses of God during 2018. I have seen God step into our lives bringing comfort and joy regardless of our circumstances. Prayers were answered in surprising ways. Finances were supplied in ways we never could have dreamed. Simply, God showed up. All of these things reminding me that I can depend on God for all things.
God reminded me over this past year that regardless of our circumstances he is still in control. He taught me that joy comes from him, not from some happy feeling due to comfort. I love comfort. I don’t love being uncomfortable. Yet, over the past year, God has shown me that loving comfort has been an idol for me. I was desperately clinging to being comfortable rather than clinging to God. I was not depending on God as my source of joy and peace, I was depending on my circumstances.
Have you found idols in your life this past year? What has God been teaching you? Do you find yourself depending on God or on what you can control in your life?
Letting Go of what I thought I needed.
In addition to learning I had idols in my life, God is teaching me that I need to drop those idols and cling only to him. That is taking on many different faces over this next year. Some of the changes may look like stereotypical resolutions. Others may not be visible to others at all.
Ultimately I want my life to be moving closer to always depending on God. In the midst of sickness, our messy life and unknown and fearful circumstances I want my first response to be depending on God. I want to be moving closer to God. This next year my goal is to keep my eyes focused on Jesus each and every day.